Dating · Female · love · Personal Story · Positive Thinking · Ramblings · Relationships · Women

And my soul exhaled and I inhaled you: 10 things I want in my next relationship.

As time passes by and we continue on the journey of growth, experiences, and love, we start to learn a lot about who we are, where we are going, and who we want to go there with. Although I am still single … (the Instagram man was a short-lived, yet beautiful romance…with whom I wish would have come a little later on, as I am still just not quite ready for what he had to offer)…I still dream of the things that will come with a relationship…so I made a top 10 list of things that I cannot wait for. I can wait…because I am…but I’m so very excited for when that wait is finally over!6551_4602170133240_1324830460_n

Let’s start at the top and work our way down:

10. Romantic stuff – like holding hands, opening doors, kissing foreheads, and leaving cute notes. I had a small taste of this recently, and my oh my is it wonderful. I hadn’t really had this before. I’ve had a little here and there – but never something the lasted. Those actions come from the heart, and when they are true, they never stop.

9. A dog. The other day, my best friend says, “the kind of dog a guy gets for himself says a lot about who he is”. Wise words my dogless friend…because I know that I’m not yet ready to make the commitment to get a dog, as much as I want one. So, I definitely want the guy I’m dating to have a dog. And then, eventually, we could get a dog together, and it would be our little family…because let’s face it, if you can take care of a dog, you can probably take care of kids…and I want kids.

8. Silence. There is nothing more beautiful than sharing a silent moment with someone you love. You don’t feel the need for idle chat. You can sit on the couch together, reading a book, editing photos, playing with your dog, whatever it is…you can do that, with someone else, without saying a word. Because it isn’t about talking, it is about being close to someone’s energy.

7. Taking car rides together must be fun. I’m kind of an uptight driver – I don’t really speed, I don’t text, I don’t break the law (most of the time) and I get really anxious when I’m driving with someone who does the above things. Or doesn’t pay attention. Or drives really slow. I hate the feeling of constantly checking my mirrors, turning my head, and being afraid of driving. I want to enjoy the ride.

6. Telling each other how beautiful we are. In my past, I have gotten upset when my boyfriend called me “nice”…because, well, you call your grandma nice. When your overweight, 70+ year-old great aunt wears that horrible floral sweater in the middle of summer…you say, “wow so-and-so, you look nice!”…but really you just mean that she looks frumpy and that sweater needs to get donated, asap. So yes, I want someone who tells me I’m beautiful. And I want to tell someone they are beautiful. Because, even though apparently you are supposed to call men “handsome” or “sexy”…I want someone who I think is beautiful. Inside and out.

5.To cook breakfast, lunch, and dinner for a person. I love to cook, to eat, and to feed those I love. I know this one will come with time…It will start off with a dinner (maybe one that has already happened) cooked because you both were too tired to leave the house yet wanted to eat together. You’ll throw some stuff into a pan, boil some water for noodles, and toss some parmesan cheese on top, then serve it up to that person, and watch them enjoy it…all the while, you enjoy them enjoying something you made them. And at the end of the meal, they thank you, not only for the delicious meal, but for being who you are. And then it begins, and eventually, you’ll be cooking them breakfast in the morning, packing their lunch to take to work, and welcoming them home with a warm dinner.

4. To almost be jealous of their relationship with their family. I love my family. They are my best friends. We have matching infinity rings that represent the infinite love we have for each other. I can spend a whole Saturday on my parent’s couch just talking. I love my family, a lot. And I want to be with someone who loves theirs just as much, if not more. I want to get annoyed that they are having too much fun to leave and come sit around with me. I want them to cherish holidays with their family. I want us to argue about who’s parents’ house we go to for Christmas Day vs. Eve…Thanksgiving…Passover/Easter. But in time, I want us to host both of our families in our home, together.

3. To dance in the rain together. I want to find a person who appreciates the little joys in life. When I was a kid, one of my favorite activities was dancing in the rain, with my brother. We would be naked or in a bathing suit, and just dance and dance and dance until we exhaustedly strolled back into the house, soaking wet, and with huge smiles on our faces. One time, as I was jumping in puddles with a frog raincoat on (I was 2, and I would still wear it today, if I had one), a clown came up and said “frog in a puddle” and I just started crying. That is my worst memory with rain, puddles, and clowns…and it really isn’t that bad. But dancing in the rain is more than just fun…it’s about still being a child at heart. Although sometimes I may act very mature and professional, I’m still a kid at heart. I still want to chase the rainbow. I still hope that if I leave my window open, one night, Peter Pan will fly in and take me to Neverland. And I want to share that silly feeling with someone else.

2. I want to adventure together. Yes, we may have different hobbies. You may be a little more adventurous than me. You may be better at sports or outdoor activities. You may go on your guy weekend trips skiing in the mountains, or a backpacking trip with your brother…and that is fine. But I want us to do things together, so we have these amazing memories of how well we work as a team…so that in 10 years, when we have a few toddlers running around the house, we can look back and remember how much fun it was taking down the campsite in a thunderstorm…or cleaning poop off of our shoes because we were too captivated by the starry sky to look down at the trail. Not only do I want to go on these crazy adventures together, but I want us to have little mini-adventures every day of our lives…from the silly way you wake me up, to the scavenger hunt I sent you on to get your birthday present (yes, I stole that from Parks & Rec…but I’ve always loved scavenger hunts). I want to discover each other in our adventures and realize that any adventure together is better than one apart.

1. I want complete and utter honesty and trust. I want to tell you that I’m scared without being afraid to say it. I want you to ask me anything in the world and regardless of my response, hold me and love me for it…because I love you enough to be honest…and you love me enough to trust what I say is the truth. If I look horrible in an outfit, tell me. If you made a disgusting meal, I’ll tell you. From the smallest thing to the biggest, I want to be real. I want to be who I am and not feel like I have to hide that to be with someone. I want to know everything about you, even things you don’t really know about yourself…and the only way to have that is to trust and to be honest with yourself and others.

Is that too much to ask for? I don’t think so.

Until next time, love yourself & others ❤

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